right, illustrious catch up time (p.s. I am a little high, however i’m alone and soul shattering-ly bored)
new stuff: 3rd year, gym addiction, actually beginning to care about my degree - quite a lot - and i’m no closer to extinguishing my lust to replace … her
nevertheless lets vent! I don’t really remember much from summer, other than a permanent sense of inebriation and braking a girls heart after having umpteen amount of one night stands, which in all fairness she instigated and I was more than willing to oblige, then (I can’t honestly believe I’m saying this) love????? gets in the way, or lust, I don’t really know, but she was great and I do somewhat regret not actually taking things further, only for the reason my sister (who is practically my mother, not incestuously just in respect to guidance in life and my conscience, she raised me practically, but that is a story for my inexorable counselling) said she looked like a witch and I was condemned to sleep with her again, and yes I shouldn’t really care if it’s love, but I do and she is like 99% right majorly, but the best thing about … summer girl aha, was that underneath her innocence, the kind of innocence which can’t melt butter, she was filth, like full ON! she would sit on my face, on her own volition, no questions or prompts, just do it, as if it was a mandatory task like emptying the bin, or having a shower, just hopped right up and smothered me with her excessively large uvula (their the beef curtains right?) (I have no fucking clue who I’m asking as I have no followers) SUPERFLUOUS, she was an adventurous lover, but also very clingy and used to force me to stay the morning after and bribe me with tea and bacon, then we’d watch friends and I’d feel terrible as I had to lie and propagate this false love repeatedly to get a warm bed on a night (wasn’t always the sex, majority of nights mother had locked me out) so yeah, summer girl happened, and now she fucking hates me!!! … can’t see why Lolzzzz! but for the record, she was quite lovely and actually I am somewhat pining after her as since summer girl I’ve not had sex like it. Actually I’ve had one other escapade since and that was terrible, so bad in fact I snap chatted? snapped? snappoed? snappered? us in bed with the caption *shit shag* which she was! I’m a selfless guy, I don’t mind doing the work, then you’re remembered fondly and I suppose it’s reciprocal altruism! women love a good goss!!
right yeah, but we’l brush over that dismal endevour as it still gives me night terrors (AND SHE’S ON MY COURSE!!) FUCK SAKE WILL!
next topic, EILIS IS BACK!!! well briefly, then she broke my heart again … bitchhhh! I suppose I shouldn’t get my hopes up, but as I’m sure my aforementioned posts about the Festival Girlfriend will enlighten me/you. I was so pathetic and had me reduced to a romantic wreck just lusting after the perfect girl, who incidentally isn’t so perfect anymore (but even on here I don’t want to divulge true feelings as I can’t really bring myself to do so, she still is perfect really, that’s the problem, she doesn’t see me even fractionally in the same way) so we went to a gig, was awesome, no complaints, snook in a bottle of voddy, everything was kushty … UNTIL she sort of has a boyf?????? what the FECK! when she planned it all (I KNOW) she was single, then she’s back with this degenerate cunt (oooft dark) superfluous it’s not fair, the one girl I actually adored and epitomised as this vision of pure beauty, style and sex is just playing me … AGAIN! so i’m done with that shit! (i wish) but yes to my annihilated love and unconditional need to bed this devine goddess i alas have failed, and Imagine that was my last shot! she did stay the night, I did like try and seduce her knowing her Achilles heel - quite literally, she has a FOOT FETISH, her feet obvs - and she said and I quote “i forgot how big you were” *gesting to my penis* which at that point I was rolling my sleeves and putting the waders on!
the future is bright mind, there is another … who is way out my league but isn’t my type so I don’t really know what to think, I love her body and personality but she is quite orange, but indie orange … ish, and she’s into rap and shit and I don;t get it at all, whats with hoses and televisions which makes them so appealing?
she told me she liked me tonight, this very night, I tried to make light of it usuing a Lee evans joke saying I’ll kick her in the shins next time I see her just so she knows it’s mutual … she never replied ahahaha
so, there you have it tumblr, another exert of my miserable conquest to replacing … her, which seems to be improving but nothing resounding as of yet, the future is bright and green like my eyes currently!
Much Love, Will